#2246 Christmas Presents"The parasitism might be mediated by a fungus!" exclaimed the biologist who was trying to ruin Christmas again.
#2247 Weird HillI'm compromising by picking a weird hill to lie on.
#2248 New Year's Eve"Off-by-one errors" isn't the easiest theme to build a party around, but I've seen worse.
#2249 I Love the 20sBillboard's "Best of the 80s" chart includes Blondie's 1980 hit "Call Me." QED.
#2250 OK/okay/okAfter changing it back and forth several times and consulting with internet linguist Gretchen McCulloch, I settled on "ok" in my book How To, but I'm still on the fence. Maybe I should just switch to "oK."
#2251 Alignment Chart Alignment ChartI would describe my personal alignment as "lawful heterozygous silty liquid."
#2252 Parenthetical NamesI never got around to seeing that movie about the battle (of Midway).
#2253 Star Wars Voyager 1There's some flexibility depending on your standards for measuring runtime and the various special editions. If you still want to have a party, I'm sure you can find some combination that works.
#2254 JPEG2000I was actually a little relieved when I learned that JPEG2000 was used in the DCI digital cinema standard. I was feeling so bad for it!
#2255 Tattoo IdeasThe text ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US with a lengthy footnote explaining that I got this tattoo in 2020 and not, as you may assume, 2001, but offering no further clarification.
#2256 Bad Map Projection: South AmericaThe projection does a good job preserving both distance and azimuth, at the cost of really exaggerating how many South Americas there are.
#2257 Unsubscribe MessageA mix of the two is even worse: 'Thanks for unsubscribing and helping us pare this list down to reliable supporters.'
#2258 Solar System Changes"Actually, Jupiter already has a very impressive ring system!" --someone who knows Jupiter is within earshot
#2259 Networking ProblemsLOOK, THE LATENCY FALLS EVERY TIME YOU CLAP YOUR HANDS AND SAY YOU BELIEVE
#2260 Reaction MapsIf Google Maps stops letting you navigate to (Clay County District) A in West Virginia, you can try Jump, OH -> Ina, IL -> Big Hole, TX.
#2261 Worst Thing That Could HappenBefore I install any patch, I always open the patch notes and Ctrl-F for 'supervolcano', 'seagull', and 'garbage disposal', just to be safe.
#2262 Parker Solar ProbeIt will get within 9 or 10 Sun-diameters of the "bottom" (the Sun's surface) which seems pretty far when you put it that way, but from up here on Earth it's practically all the way down.
#2263 CicadasAfter a while you adjust to the new cicadian rhythm.
#2264 SatelliteIf you're going to let it burn up, make sure it happens over the deep end of the bathtub and not any populated parts of the house!
#2265 Tax AII ended up getting my tax return prepared at a local place by a really friendly pretrained neural net named Greg.
#2266 Leap SmearingSome people suspect that it started as a "No, I didn't forget Valentine's Day" excuse that got out of hand.
#2267 BlockchainBlockchains are like grappling hooks, in that it's extremely cool when you encounter a problem for which they're the right solution, but it happens way too rarely in real life.
#2268 Further Research is NeededFurther research is needed to fully understand how we managed to do such a good job.
#2269 Phylogenetic TreeAnd I was kicked out of my March Madness pool because I wouldn't shut up about the evidence for NBA/ABA endosymbiosis.
#2270 Picking Bad StocksOn the news a few days later: "Buzz is building around the so-called 'camping Roomba' after a big investment. Preorders have spiked, and..."
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