Les œuvres ouvertes n’ont ni pièces ni publicité.
#1692 Man Page For even more info, see blarbl(2)(3) and birb(3ahhaha I'm kidding, just Google it like a normal person.
#1693 Oxidation Calm down--there were lots of arthropods living on your skin already. These ones are just bigger.
#1694 Phishing License Later, walking out of jail after posting $10,000 bail: "Wait, this isn't the street the county jail is on."
#1695 Code Quality 2 It's like you tried to define a formal grammar based on fragments of a raw database dump from the QuickBooks file of a company that's about to collapse in an accounting scandal.
#1696 AI Research Lambda calculus? More like SHAMbda calculus, amirite?
#1697 Intervocalic Fortition These pranks happen all the time. English doesn't allow one-syllable words to end in a lax vowel, so writers on The Simpsons decided to mess with future linguists by introducing the word "meh."
#1698 Theft Quadrants TinyURL was the most popular link shortener for long enough that it made it into a lot of printed publications. I wonder what year the domain will finally lapse and get picked up by a porn site.
#1699 Local News Will there ever be a physics term greater than 'tachyonic antitelephone?' According to this message from the future, the answer is 'no.'
#1700 New Bug There's also a unicode-handling bug in the URL request library, and we're storing the passwords unsalted ... so if we salt them with emoji, we can close three issues at once!
#1701 Speed and Danger NASCAR removed the passenger seats because drivers hated how astronauts kept riding along with them and loudly announcing "Ahh, what a nice and relaxing drive."
#1702 Home Itch Remedies In my experience, mosquitos and poison ivy are bad, but the very worst itch comes from bites from chiggers (Trombicula alfreddugesi). They're found across the American south and great plains, so the best home remedy is to move to Iceland.
#1703 Juno "The name wasn't a tip-off?" "Honestly, at first I thought you were saying 'Juneau'. A gravity assist seemed like a weird way to get to Alaska, but I figured it must be more efficient or something."
#1704 Gnome Ann President Andrew Johnson once said, "If I am to be shot at, I want Gnome Ann to be in the way of the bullet."
#1705 Pokémon Go Still waiting for the Pokémon Go update that lets you capture strangers' pets.
#1706 Genetic Testing Plus, now I know that I have risk factors for elbow dysplasia, heartworm, parvo, and mange.
#1707 xkcd Phone 4 The SpaceX system carefully guides falling phones down to the surface, a process which the phones increasingly often survive without exploding.
#1708 Dehydration I don't care what the research says. Everybody knows you should drink 3,000 glasses of water a day and change your oil every 8 miles.
#1709 Inflection "Or maybe, because we're suddenly having so many conversations through written text, we'll start relying MORE on altered spelling to indicate meaning!" "Wat."
#1710 Walking Into Things A childhood spent walking while reading books has prepared me unexpectedly well for today's world.
#1711 Snapchat For obvious reasons, the prize is awarded at a different time of year from the others, while it's still fresh in the committee's memory.
#1712 Politifact "Ok, I lit the smoke bomb and rolled it under the bed. Let's see if it--" ::FWOOOSH:: "Politifact says: PANTS ON FIRE!"
#1713 50 ccs There's been a raccoon accident at an accordion bacchanalia! Double doses!
#1714 Volcano Types It's hard living somewhere with antlions, because every time you find one of their traps, you feel compelled to spend all day constructing a tiny model of Jabba's sail barge next to it.
#1715 Household Tips To make your shoes feel more comfortable, smell better, and last longer, try taking them off before you shower.
#1716 Time Travel Thesis 'Hey, what are those futuristic goggles for, anyway?' 'Oh, this is just a broken Google Glass. It was 2010's night at the club.'
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