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#1361 Google Announcement The less popular 8.8.4.4 is slated for discontinuation.
#1362 Morse Code Oh, because Facebook has worked out SO WELL for everyone.
#1363 xkcd Phone Presented in partnership with Qualcomm, Craigslist, Whirlpool, Hostess, LifeStyles, and the US Chamber of Commerce. Manufactured on equipment which also processes peanuts. Price includes 2-year Knicks contract. Phone may extinguish nearby birthday candles. If phone ships with Siri, return immediately; do not speak to her and ignore any instructions she gives. Do not remove lead casing. Phone may attract/trap insects; this is normal. Volume adjustable (requires root). If you experience sudden tingling, nausea, or vomiting, perform a factory reset immediately. Do not submerge in water; phone will drown. Exterior may be frictionless. Prolonged use can cause mood swings, short-term memory loss, and seizures. Avert eyes while replacing battery. Under certain circumstances, wireless transmitter may control God.
#1364 Like I'm Five 'Am I taking care of you? I have a thesis to write!' 'My parents are at their house; you visited last--' 'No, no, explain like you're five.'
#1365 Inflation Wait till they notice the faint reflection of Michael Jordan and Bugs Bunny in the E-mode.
#1366 Train Trains rotate the Earth around various axes while elevators shift its position in space.
#1367 Installing But still, my scheme for creating and saving user config files and data locally to preserve them across reinstalls might be useful for--wait, that's cookies.
#1368 One Of The 'The world's greatest [whatever]' is subjective, but 'One of the world's greatest [whatever]s' is clearly objective. Anyway, that's why I got you this 'one of the world's greatest moms' mug!!['The world's greatest [whatever]' is subjective, but 'One of the world's greatest [whatever]s' is clearly objective. Anyway, that's why I got you this 'one of the world's greatest moms' mug!](https://img.comicstation.store/comics/xkcd/1368/0.png)
#1369 TMI 'TMI' he whispered, gazing into the sea.
#1370 President Anyone who thinks we're all going to spend the 2032 elections poring over rambling blog posts by teenagers has never tried to read a rambling blog post by a teenager.
#1371 Brightness Recently, some exoplanet astronomers have managed to use careful analysis of reflected light to discover Earth during the day.
#1372 Smartwatches This is even better than my previous smartphone casemod: an old Western Electric Model 2500 desk phone handset complete with a frayed, torn-off cord dangling from it.
#1373 Screenshot I'M PLUGGING IN MY PHONE BUT THE BATTERY ON THE SCREEN ISN'T CHARGING
#1374 Urn Can this PLEASE be drawing with replacement?
#1375 Astronaut Vandalism That night, retired USAF pilots covertly replaced the '62' with '50'.
#1376 Jump Or that I'm at least following the curve of the Earth around to land ...
#1377 Fish [Astronomer peers into telescope] [Jaws theme begins playing]![[Astronomer peers into telescope] [Jaws theme begins playing]](https://img.comicstation.store/comics/xkcd/1377/0.png)
#1378 Turbine Ok, plan B: Fly a kite into the blades, with a rock in a sling dangling below it, and create the world's largest trebuchet.
#1379 4.5 Degrees The good news is that according to the latest IPCC report, if we enact aggressive emissions limits now, we could hold the warming to 2°C. That's only HALF an ice age unit, which is probably no big deal.
#1380 Manual for Civilization We will have an entire wing of the library devoted to copies of book #26, because ohmygod it's the one where Jake and Cassie finally KISS!!!
#1381 Margin PROTIP: You can get around the Shannon-Hartley limit by setting your font size to 0.
#1382 Rocket Packs Every year: 'It's <year>--I want my jetpack [and also my free medical care covering all my jetpack-related injuries]!'![Every year: 'It's <year>--I want my jetpack [and also my free medical care covering all my jetpack-related injuries]!'](https://img.comicstation.store/comics/xkcd/1382/0.png)
#1383 Magic Words 'And then whisper 'anapest' in my ear as you hold me?'
#1384 Krypton Their Sun and gravity will make you, uh, something, I guess. Out of earshot from Earth, mostly.
#1385 Throwing Rocks ::PLOOOOSH:: Looks like you won't be making it to Vinland today, Leaf Erikson.
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