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#602 Overstimulated My favorite thing to do at parties is to talk judgmentally about people who aren't there.
#603 Idiocracy People aren't going to change, for better or for worse. Technology's going to be so cool. All in all, the future will be okay! Except climate; we fucked that one up.
#604 Qwertial Aphasia If this were SMBC, the alt-text drawing thingy would be a giraffe hooker fluttering her eyelashes.
#605 Extrapolating By the third trimester, there will be hundreds of babies inside you.
#606 Cutting Edge I remember trying to log in to the original Command and Conquer servers a year or two back and feeling like I was knocking on the boarded-up gates of a ghost town.
#607 2038 If only we'd chosen 1944-12-02 08:45:52 as the Unix epoch, we could've combined two doomsday scenarios into one and added a really boring scene to that Roland Emmerich movie.
#608 Form 'This space intentionally left blank' is less immediately provocative but more Hofstadterially confusing.
#609 Tab Explosion Cracked.com is another inexplicable browser narcotic. They could write a list of '17 worst haircuts in the Ottoman Empire' and I'd read through to the end, then click on all the links at the end.
#610 Sheeple Hey, what are the odds -- five Ayn Rand fans on the same train! Must be going to a convention.
#611 Disaster Voyeurism Hurricane forums are full of excited comments about central pressure and wind speed and comparisons to Camille and 1931 and 1938, with hastily-tacked-on notes about how it will be tragic if anyone dies and they hope it's a dud.
#612 Estimation They could say "the connection is probably lost," but it's more fun to do naive time-averaging to give you hope that if you wait around for 1,163 hours, it will finally finish.
#613 Threesome I wanted us to try finding an approximate numeric solution, but noooo.
#614 Woodpecker If you don't have an extension cord I can get that too. Because we're friends! Right?
#615 Avoidance Hobby: seeing how many menu selections you can get someone to go through before they realize you're not an automated system and/or hang up.
#616 Lease You should talk to the girl down the hall; I think you'd like her. Lemme know if you find out why she's ordering all those colored plastic balls.
#617 Understocked My biology grad student friends tell me that different types of alcohol don't actually have different effects. I trust their expertise, not because of the 'biology' part, but because of the 'grad student'.
#618 Asteroid My Deep Impact/Little Prince crossover fanfic has been poorly received by the community.
#619 Supported Features I hear many of you finally have smooth Flash support, but me and my Intel card are still waiting on a kernel patch somewhere in the pipeline before we can watch Jon Stewart smoothly.
#620 Wings Please do not try any of this and die or get arrested.
#621 Superlative Stay while I recount the crazy TF2 kill I managed yesterday, my friends.
#622 Haiku Proof After somewhere around 40 hours, there's no academic reason to go to the class. Only go for the hallucinations.
#623 Oregon A century later, the harrowing flight of the survivors from Oregon was dramatized in a popular video game.
#624 Branding Actually, 'RSS&M' is kinda catchy.
#625 Collections You know what really helps an existential crisis? Wondering how much shelf space to leave for a Terry Pratchett collection.
#626 Newton and Leibniz YEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!
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